Manners First

On October 28, 2008, the Ontario government tabled legislation that will ban text messaging and emailing while driving and force motorists to use hands-free cell phones on the road.

A similar ban already exists in Newfoundland-Labrador, Quebec and Nova Scotia – and legislation has been put forward in Prince Edward Island and Manitoba. Alberta rejected a cell phone ban earlier this year. A few states in the U.S. have a ban, as do many countries including Australia, France, Germany, Hong Kong, India, Ireland, Israel, Poland, Portugal, Russia, Spain, Turkey and the UK.

Opponents of the ban say that if cell phones are banned then so should applying makeup while driving, talking to someone else in the car, listening to the radio or eating a burger.

Supporters of the legislation say that too many lives are at stake due to these distractions, and safety should come first.

Some of the rudest electronic device experiences have happened during meals, especially in restaurants with dinner partners ignoring you to answer calls or return email, diners talking too loudly or cell phones ringing incessantly.

At the movies, people ignore the “turn off electronic devices” message and take phone calls. Some are too inconsiderate to leave the room or switch their phones to vibrate.

In a business setting such as during an interview, meeting or a conference, coworkers are often busy texting or taking calls instead of giving their attention to why they were required to be in attendance.

Most embarrassing is having to listen to someone engaged in a fight and/or yelling while in a public place. You feel as a voyeur and are often drawn in as a moth to a flame.

Queues being held up by someone trying to text or talk are also nuisances and cell phones ringing in serene or high etiquette settings such as a wedding, church, funeral, hospital, or a classroom are just plain rude. And finally, the ultimate invasion of privacy occurs when phones ring in the bathroom. The receiver often answers the phone and proceeds to tell the caller that they are in the bathroom but doesn’t end the call.


The reality of this situation is that most of the conversations taking place do not necessarily have to happen when they do. The conversations are not elevated ones designed to make the world a better place. They don’t discuss ideas for improving even the lives of the participants. Electronic devices have people moving together but operating in silos.


If you must answer your electronic device, here’s how to be more polite:

• Let the person you are with know in advance that you are expecting an important call or email


• Say “excuse me” and move away from the setting and don’t make them listen to the entire call or watch you compose your email


• Don’t shush the person you are speaking with to hear the call


• Allow your calls to go to voice mail and excuse yourself to take the time to return the call or email


• Avoid taking more than one call or returning more than one email in any situation that has a finite time (e.g.: a 20-minute lunch)


• Answer and make quick arrangements to call back


• Don’t check caller ID and then not take the call

Manners are a sensitive awareness of the feelings of others. If you have that awareness, you have good manners, no matter which fork you use.

- Emily Post

These are interesting times.

C. Carol Brown

Givers Get

The Great Depression in the United States began on "Black Tuesday" with the Wall Street crash of October, 1929 and rapidly spread worldwide. The market crash marked the beginning of a decade of high unemployment, poverty, low profits, deflation and lost opportunities for economic growth and personal advancement. It is thought that the basic cause of the Great Depression was a sudden loss of confidence in the economic future and a combination of high consumer debt, ill-regulated markets that permitted malfeasance by banks and investors, cutbacks in foreign trade, and growing wealth inequality, all interacting to create a downward economic spiral of reduced spending and production.

The recent declines in the financial markets have many people losing hours of sleep worrying about their investment and retirement plans. These declines have people thinking there will be a shortage of money and that we are heading into another depression akin to the Great Depression and they should hoarde what little they have left.

But the truth is actually very different. The truth is that there is more than enough money to make the world go around. Abundance is our natural state--not lack.

In the book The One Minute Millionaire: The Enlightened Way to Wealth by Mark Victor Hansen and Robert G. Allen they teach about the Enlightened Millionaire. One of their "AHA!" moments explains the power of Giving as the highest form of manifestation of our truest nature. They tell us to donate the first 10% of all we earn to charities and churches in our communities. Why? Because giving multiplies prosperity a thousand times. Take a look as some of the biggest givers--Oprah Winfrey, John D. Rockerfeller, Andrew Carnegie and Bill Gates. They continue to be prosperous and in fact attain more prosperity each year.

The authors believe that the more you give, the more you'll get because giving gives the greatest return on your money. Giving expands money much as water expands when it is heated. Giving magnifies, multiplies and exponentializes money. Conversely, the tighter you squeeze, the smaller and tighter money becomes. Remember Scrooge before the ghosts visited? But you must give from an attitude of gratitute and abundance. Giving is a seed that continues to produce, not just for you, but also for those around you.

In this time of negative newspaper headlines and special reports about the bleak future of our finances, think about turning off the television, or not reading the newspaper. This will help to keep your thoughts and emotions positive. Rather, think about charities or foundations to which you can contribute or someone you may know that can use some financial help. Give to someone or something that needs your support. You'll be surprised at what you get back.

You must give to get, You must sow the seed, before you can reap the harvest.--Scott Reed

These are interesting times.

C. Carol Brown

History in the Making

I am a Black Canadian who has been paying some attention to the Barack Obama/John McCain election. I normally don’t pay too much attention to these types of political events, but this event is historic. That we could have the first Black American President in my lifetime is historic. And in a country fraught with racism like America is, is truly a historic event—much like Nelson Mandela’s 1990 release from a 27-year prison to become, four years later, the first President of South Africa to be elected in fully representative democratic elections.

Now many will say that race doesn’t or shouldn’t matter in this election but let’s get real. This entire election has been more about race than it has been about any other issue. It is sad that in 2008 that is the reality, but America is what it is. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not bashing America. I am just stating facts.

Canada doesn’t fare much better on these issues. We have never had a Black politician even run for the country’s top role of Prime Minister. Blacks have had minimal representation on Canada’s political stage though the issues that plague the Black community—gun, drugs, absentee fathers, poverty, unemployment—have a significant impact on the rest of the country with cities such as Halifax, Toronto, Windsor and Brampton experiencing higher incidences of violent activities that spill over to affect the general population.

All eyes are on this election. November 4, 2008 could be the dawn of a new world. It could mean real change in the way America participates in the world—no longer as a bully with strong arm tactics—but more as an equal partner.

Whether Barack Obama wins is moot as this point. Change has already started to happen.

Many have written and spoken about the power of the mind to change realities and to create a better world. Image the opulent world we could create if we used our mind for these purposes.

Thought in the mind hath made us.
What we are by thought was wrought and built.
If a man's mind hath evil thought,
pain comes on him as comes the wheel the ox behind.
If one endure in purity of thought,
Joy follows him as his own shadow - sure.

--As A Man Thinketh by James Allen--

These are interesting times. Only time will tell just how interesting.

C. Carol Brown